A windy day on Tybee Island. Photo by D. Paul Graham

“Monday 5 Things”™ ….. One Year …..

One year.  A year of you getting used to my strange sleeping (or lack thereof) hours, extended work commitments in my businesses, and for idiosyncrasies that may not have been fully believed before we got married. A year for someone that was certain he would spend the rest of his life alone. One year in which she had a return clause that she chose not to exercise. One year of profound growth, laughter, adventures, and love. One year of her excellent cooking. One year of cherishing the gift of who she is, of the importance of the little things in life, of learning to be vulnerable, and of we instead of me. One year of us. This morning’s M5T waxes philosophically, emotionally, or sappy, depending on your perspective, on a first anniversary that we all can apply every day.

1. THE GIFT OF CHOOSING. We all make so many decisions every day. Perhaps the most important choice is found in choosing to love each other as a daily decision. That’s something that the last year has taught me. It’s choosing to be there for each other, supporting, loving, celebrating together.  It is a choice to build a foundation of love that is found by showing up for each other. A choice to build on the shared little moments and laughter. It’s accepting and embracing quirks and habits that have become enduring and that are part of the magic of a marriage.

2. THE GIFT OF A JOURNEY. This past year has redefined my journey. No longer is this a solo journey. Rather, our two unique and evolving lives have come together. The profound part of the past year is that we are growing individually while walking a shared path. We are partners in the true sense of the word, all the while revealing ways that we can both grow and change individually without losing sight of one another. Each step, each prayer, each milestone, each adventure, each simple moment of just being with each other has served to deepen our understanding of and commitment to each other. A journey traveled together has the power to endure, heal, and grow. The past year has been one of building a shared narrative, as we weave the tapestry of our life.

3. THE GIFT OF PATIENCE. Deeper love stretches beyond romance. It’s a practice rooted in patience, kindness, and understanding. It is patience and kindness that softens hearts, allowing you to listen, to forgive quickly, and to genuinely understand. To be fully loved means to be fully accepted, flaws and all. It’s patience that doesn’t seek to change but rather to support and uplift. It’s a rare gift, and profound basis of sanctuary, to know that you are accepted just as you are. Acceptance of both yourself and your partner. The gift of patience doesn’t seek perfection but embraces each other’s flaws with grace and peace.

4. THE GIFT OF PRESENCE. Today life pulls us in countless directions, yet marriage is a reminder of the importance of the gift of presence. Showing up fully for one another, in both small and big moments, holds a quiet unshakable power. Over this past year, the impact of simply being there for each other, even in silence, has been profound. The practice of presence, truly seeing each other and to allow oneself to be fully seen, is perhaps one of love’s greatest gifts. Presence gives you the courage to be vulnerable without fear of being judged, and to witness each other’s true self, flaws and all, reinforcing a love that is based on authenticity. Presence exposes that vulnerability is a strength not a weakness. Presence deepens a relationship with the roots of trust and openness and reveals that two committed souls are better together.

5. THE GIFT OF BEING SEEN & HEARD. One of the reflective gifts of a committed relationship is being sincerely seen and heard. To be known deeply by another, to have someone understand the essence of who you are, is one of life’s most extraordinary gifts. Each genuine shared laugh, gentle touch, or tender look offers a glimpse into something that feels beautifully infinite. That can only be experienced when you feel you are seen and heard for who you are. When you are given that gift, even in the mundane routines of daily life, there is something timeless and eternal in love that is deeply shared and acknowledged. Being seen and heard in a world filled with noise and clamoring for our attention, allows shared silence with a loved to become all the more important. This past year I’ve learned that in those quiet moments, a comfortable silence after a long day or a wordless understanding, that a profound connection has grown. One of the insightful gifts of a committed relationship is being seen and accepted as you are. To be known deeply by another, to have someone understand the essence of who you are, is one of life’s most extraordinary gifts.

Here’s to one year, and to many more years of growth, faith, laughter and love, together.

For over 12 years, D. Paul Graham has published “Monday 5 Things” ™, also known to readers as M5T™.  He continues to be thankful for how fulfilled Lee Ann has made his life.

© 2024 D. Paul Graham.

You can reach Paul by email at dpg@imagegraham.com

“Monday 5 Things” ™ and M5T™ are trademarks of D. Paul Graham