Monday 5 Things”™ ….. Stocking Stuffers …..

With only 2 shopping days left until Christmas, some of you may be still wondering what to put into the stocking of that special person in your life. Why settle for predictable peppermint bark, Chapstick, candy canes, or scratch-off tickets? This morning’s M5T has assembled some unique ideas that will upgrade your gift-game for those stockings hung by the chimney with care.

1. FOODIE FUNGUS. Want to make your stocking smell like an enchanted forest or fragrance your living room with “notes of earth and opulence”? Truffles will do the job. For the price of a small mortgage payment, Italian white truffles are currently priced at $5.00 a gram, or about $2,400 per pound. Give it a try – Agnolotti del Plin Funghi e Tartufo never tasted so good.

2. A GEM OF DEAL. If your special person is on the good list, they don’t need to worry about a clump of coal in their stocking. One of the rarest gemstones on earth, Painite is perfect for the person who has everything … and one who prefers that you know they have everything. It’s like gifting someone the concept of scarcity. Since it is so rare, this red stone, often mistaken for a ruby, will set you back between $50,000 about $60,000 per carat. Mineralogist Arthur Pain, discovered the gem in Myanmar in the 1950’s. The stone was named after him, but I personally think it’s appropriately named for the pain one might experience spending this much for a piece of rock.

3. SPICE OF LIFE. This thread-like spice is not just for paella. It’s a culinary flex of the highest order. Stuffing a stocking with saffron says, “I believe in your potential as a chef, and I expect results.” Saffron is $11.13 a gram or about $5,040 per pound. Before you throw your Black Amex Centurion card down at the check-out, make sure you have Spanish saffron which is considered to be better than Iranian saffron. It’s a perfect gift for foodies and aspiring Michelin-star chefs. But, if you give this to that one family member who keeps asking for “saffron rice”, make sure you include good cooking recipes, or you may just end up with the world’s most expensive yellow oatmeal.

4. BLACK GOLD. Nothing screams “holiday cheer” quite like pulling a tin of exclusive fish eggs from a fuzzy red sock. Just make sure the stocking is refrigerated. Iranian Beluga Caviar will set you back $1,000 per ounce, served with unsalted crackers and a wooden serving spoon. Personally, I pass on the crackers and prefer a simple mother of pearl spoon for this taste bud treat, if only to avoid possible wood splints from a small wooden serving spoon. If you opt for this stocking stuffer, Tiffany & Co. sells vintage mother of pearl caviar spoons for $425. You’re welcome. If you want to really go fishing, try the Almas which is rare 60-to-100-year-old Iranian Beluga sturgeon ova at a price of between $3,000 and $4,000 per ounce. Spoon it up and savior that roe popping in your mouth.

5. POP THE CORK. Because sometimes a mini bottle of prosecco doesn’t say “I love you” loud enough. Dom Pérignon P3 Plénitude Brut Rosé, or Dom P3 Rosé for those in the know, is the champagne equivalent of showing up to a potluck dinner with a private chef. By the time everyone wakes up to their stockings hung and stuffed with care, you’ll have elevated your gift-giving status from “that’s so thoughtful” to “oh la vache!”. Bonus points if you can convince the recipient to open the bottle at breakfast along with your soufflé pour le petit déjeuner. Be advised that orange juice should never, ever, share the same flute with this bubbly. A bottle of Dom P3 Rosé will set you back $5,300. For those on a more cost-conscious budget at this time of year, Dom P3 Brut is a bargain at $4,830 for the bottle. A sabre à champagne to practice your sabrage is extra, and, at these prices, should be used with extreme caution.

Here’s to a week of the true luxuries in our lives – the love, connection, support, joy, presence, and sense of belonging with our family and friends as we celebrate Christmas. Merry Christmas to you all!

For over 13 years, D. Paul Graham has published “Monday 5 Things” ™, also known to readers as M5T™.  He continues in his quest for the perfect Agnolotti del Plin Funghi e Tartufo.

© 2024 D. Paul Graham.

You can reach Paul by email at dpg@imagegraham.com

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