"Monday 5 Things" with D. Paul Graham


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Photo: D. Paul Graham

Monday 5 Things…..Give…..

So much of life seems to be built on the idiom of “give and take.” Last week, M5T discussed things to “take” in life. It seemed to be appropriate this week to consider things we all have the propensity with which to “give” in our lives. Hence, today’s M5T transitions without interruption to matters of “give.”

1. Give an Ear.

Not in a van Gogh kind of way. Pause and give an ear to what someone else is saying, without that inner dialogue of what you think or presuppose that the person is going to say. Really listen. Your ear gives attention and focus on someone else. Giving someone your ear is a sign of respect and recognition. It’s showing that person that what they have to say matters. Your ear can give support, consideration and affirmation. Giving an ear can help bring clarity to difficult situations, can help you learn, and can calm tense situations.

2. Give some Love.

Giving love takes vulnerability and trust. True love is compassionate, and as Paul wrote, love is patient and kind. Love can be Agape, Eros, Ludus, Philia, Pragma and Storge; soulful, romantic, playful, platonic, enduring and familiar. Take a chance and give some love to those most significant to you. Be patient — with others and with yourself. Give yourself a break and realize you are loveable, not matter what anyone says about you.

3. Give a Laugh.

Laughing is contagious and healthy. Drop the pretense and learn to laugh easily at yourself. Never hold back on genuinely laughing with others. Laughing diffuses stress, frustration and busyness. Chuckles, chortles, guffaws, howls, and yes, even snorts are all types of laughs you can give freely. But the best laughs are those side-splitting, rib-aching, bending at the waist, clutching your stomach, tears rolling down your face laughs, (and possibly that one time in grade-school that you laughed so hard that milk came out of your nose) that are best shared with someone else. I’ll bet you laugh just thinking about times like that.

4. Give your Time.

Your time is the most precious gift that you can give to someone or to yourself. More valuable than money, time is a portion of your life that, once given, you will never get back. Giving someone time shows honor and can be a blessing to others and yourself. Giving time reveals your priorities and shapes your attitudes. Giving time can bring healing and forgiveness. Invest your time in relationships that matter. Be a mentor; use your gifts and talents that will build up others. Take time just to be with the people who are most important in your life. Giving time builds trust, intimacy and memories that don’t have expiration dates.

5. Give Positivity.

Giving positivity is a choice that can change an hour, a day, a month, a year or a lifetime. Giving positivity changes one’s countenance. Pause to think before lashing out in anger. Choose to speak kinder words. Give out more authentic thank you’s, genuine praise and honest compliments. An honest smile can diffuse the most hardened of hearts, including your own. Take a moment to check your perspective, to encourage someone and their dreams. Do what you say you will do. Show up, guide, lead, inspire. Positivity cultivates a sense of wonder, of passion, of gratitude and of health.

Here’s to a week of extraordinary, unrestrained and lavish giving in all you do and with whomever you encounter.

© 2019 D. Paul Graham, all rights reserved.

D. Paul Graham is passionate about people, culture, photography and business. He has embraced his wanderlust with his travels around the globe and is at peace with his need for spirited drives in all things automotive.

You can find M5T each Monday here on www.southmag.com and by friending D. Paul Graham on Facebook. Paul is also a contributing photographer to South Magazine. His photographic work can be found on Instagram @dpgraham and at www.imageGRAHAM.com. Your feedback is always welcome. Email Paul at dpg@imagegraham.com